Saturday, June 23

Saturday Night Live (continued)

And I wasn't going to write about this either, but fuck it. I'm one margarita and two Coronas in the bag.

I went to my parents' house last night. We saw FF2 (eh) and then watched Flight of the Conchords and John From Cincinnati. I HIGHLY recommend Flight, I am considering getting HBO just for this show. Oh and for Inside the NFL in the fall, which may be my favorite show that I've dearly missed the past 3 years. John From Cincinnati is a little out there, but you can tell some pretty cool shit will soon be revealed.

This morning we put together this massive gazebo. I love putting things together so it was actually a lot of fun, even though it took about 5 hours to finish. My parents were cool, I was cool and it was good. My mom did call my dad a fuckface at one point, but her name-calling has become rather endearing now that her sailor mouth isn't backed by psychotic rage.

I started to get sad about Dickfart and some other stuff in the late afternoon, so I decided to come back to Queens pretty early. My parents were a little upset, but I just really wanted to come home. Then my mom sort of kicked me when I was down, which is always such a blast and definitely made me want to leave.

The first thing she said to me last night when she got to the theater was "Did you wear that to work?" Now Company is very laidback about dress code on the 10th floor, the 11th floor a little more corporate. I had Casual Friday clothes on, jeans and a yellow top that can really only be described as a fashionable house-coat tee. (It's cool, I swear.) So yeah, I was definitely casual, so what? She mentioned this a couple of times. Then the best thing she said, prefaced by "I don't mean to play the mother card, buuuutttt..."

At work this week Fi and I were talking about waffle ice-cream sandwiches and I immediately got warm and fuzzy inside. Waffle ice-cream sandwiches were one of my mom's favorite things to eat so our conversation brought me back to a sweet memory that I forgot all about.

My mom was nice enough to buy waffles on the way back from the movies; we both had a sandwich while watching the HBO shows. For breakfast this morning we had waffles and bacon. For lunch I considered having another waffle ice-cream sandwich, but ditched the waffles and just had the ice-cream.

And here's where the "but" came in. My mom said I shouldn't eat ice-cream because I've gained weight and she knows I want to get back in shape. She also offered to give me $100 so that I can shop for work-appropriate tops that fit, since she knew I didn't want to buy clothes at this fatter size, with the hope I would lose weight soon.

Now picture this. I'm laying on their couch already feeling depressed and wanting to leave, but through no fault of my parents. Why the fuck would my mom think that was a good time to tell me I'm fat and need new clothes????

I must admit, I'm more upset about Dickfart then what my mom said, but I wanted to vent. For the first time ever I'm feeling pretty damn sexy, despite weighing 180 pounds. I find it ironic it's not the guy who recently rejected me, but my own darn mother that has taken my tiny bit of confidence away. And here I thought she couldn't do that anymore. Sucks ass.

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