Kids say the darndest things.

My downstairs neighbor has three granddaughters ages 6, 8, and 9.

They always run around in front of the building, but I didn't formally meet them until this July 4th when we were watching the fireworks on the roof. They're cute kids, very smart and already pretty damn sassy. They make me wonder what it's like to be a kid these days.

I'm doing laundry right now (blah) and as I was coming back in we started chatting. They told me about their families, their smelly witch teacher, and all about their ipods and cell phones. (By the way, I keep saying "they" or "their" because the 8 and 9 year old kept talking at the same time, then over each other, then over me, so I don't really know which sister each story was actually about). The 6 year old, deemed the "white one" by her older Colombian step-sisters, would occasionally say something in a high-pitched voice, but yeah, there was no way I could hear her over the other two.

They eventually got around to asking me a question, specifically which apartment I live in. Here's the convo:

ME: "I live in 4A."

8 yo (I can't remember their names): "All the way up there?!?!"

9 yo (barely breathing between sentences): "What happens if you have a cart full of groceries? Do you carry the whole cart up? Do you carry some bags up at a time? Do you have to come back down?"

ME: "I make sure I only buy what I can carry."

9 yo: "Who do you live with?"

ME: "I live by myself."

8 and/or 9 yo (at the same time and same volume so not really sure who asked what):
"YOULIVEBYYOURSELFYOUDON'TLIVEWITHANYONEYOULIVEALONEALONEYOULIVEALONE??"

ME: "Um, yep."

9 yo: "YOU MEAN YOU AIN'T GOT A HUSBAND OR NO ONE?!?!"

I laughed out loud, though slightly mortified only because she seriously screamed it. The 8 year old then asked if I had any pets so thankfully the subject quickly changed to how many pets they had and yada yada yada...

I bet Bill Cosby's spidey sense tingles whenever a kid says something like that...or at the very least when someone eats jello.