Live from Jackson, New Jersey

Labor Day party in full effect. Some tidbits thus far:

1. My mom yelled at me, saying I didn't dry off the chip bowls well enough. "The chips will get fucking soggy! JESUS!" Ahhh...motherly love. I cried a little.

2. I miss Rippie.

3. Apparently Jessica Alba has herpes. My dad heard this on WRAT so it must be true.

4. I poo pooed on a poo poo.

5. I drank four Coronas in three hours.

6. The best way to get on my mom's good side is to wash the dishes.

7. My fantasy football draft starts in 1 hour and 45 minutes. I'm nervous.

8. Mosquitoes still love me!

9. My teenage cousins are cooler than I am.

10. Perversion and sass are genetic.