Friday, May 22

Jealousy

Last night I went out drinking with the Company girls. God I miss working there. I obviously don’t miss the drama, but I definitely miss talking about comics all day. I guess I could still talk about comics if I wanted to, but I don’t. Hell I barely even read them anymore. I wonder why that is? Actually that’s not true; I do still read some of my friends’ books…

I guess there’s a part of me that feel s jealous. I’m jealous of the writers and artists. I’m jealous they have the freedom to create. I’m jealous they can put themselves out there. I’m jealous they believe in themselves enough to go for it.
What is jealousy? I think the simple definition is obviously wanting what other people have. As I write this I can’t help but think there’s more to it than that. There’s a sadness in knowing that I can potentially be, have, or do anything someone else is, has, or does, but I’m choosing not to. So for me, jealousy is a reminder that I’m not living up to my full potential.

Ugh. I’m annoying myself. I feel like a broken record.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Don't worry thighs, you are not the only one who feels that way... i too have too many ideas and not enough concentration to put pen to paper... Jealousy is the exact word i would use... i hate seeing a comic that i know i could have done, but the damn ADHD got in the way... hang in there... your not alone