Monday, April 9

I'm fine, just venting

I am so fucking pissed off right now but I don't quite know why. I hate everyone and everything. I'm so angry that I can't even watch Wheel of Fortune.



I feel better already!! Curse words are fun!!


Fuck your face fuck your ass fuck your mom just go fuck everyone.

Fuck my keyboard fuck my hulk hands fuck the eight pounds I gained this winter.

Fuck Alec Guinness for not wanting to be associated with Star Wars, fuck people who put ketchup on their hotdogs.

Fuck me for not finishing sewing my bedroom curtains, fuck me for not reading Fables even though my friend wants them back soon.

Fuck me for still chewing on my cuticles, fuck Netflix because they haven't figured out how to read my mind and mail whatever movies I think of directly to my home the minute I think of them.

Fuck my laundry (yet again!) and fuck people who spell curse words wrong on bathroom stalls.

Fuck people who say one thing and mean another and fuck people who think I mean something other than what I say.

Fuck the fact that it's April and cold, fuck the nerds on eharmony, and fuck me for my latest act of desperation which was emailing a rather famous blogger asking if we could go out some time because I think he is funny.

Fuck patience and fuck that I don't have any. Fuck my limbo job and ex-bosses. Fuck the fact that I have no fucking clue what the future holds and I am angry because things are spinning out of control when the sad thing is the things that I do have control over I don't do anything about ie losing weight, getting healthy, paying off my debt, writing a note to my landlord to fix the hole in my bathroom, living room window, oven, and handle I accidentally ripped off of my freezer door the other night.

Fuck the fact that there are so many things in life that I haven't even thought of doing because it just never occurred to me to do it.

And the last and biggest fuck you goes to Shizza. Fuck you for giving me the best friends, family, job, and experiences ever. It's fucking annoying to be this blessed and makes it hard to abuse myself, something I've been so comfortable doing my whole life. Being out of one's comfort zone whether it's negative or not is fucking scary!!

My cheeks hurt from smiling right now because I know I sound like an insane bitch (which I am), but I really needed to vent in order to come to the realization that life is fucking good so I should get over myself already and shut. the. fuck. up.

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