Splitting headache

My head hurts like hell. Some invisible jackass has rammed a corkscrew into each temple, twisting and turning the life out of my skull.

I had an interview this afternoon for a planning position at a car company here in Astoria. I knew going in that I didn't want the job, I just figured it would be good interview practice. Plus it's nice to feel wanted.

The day started off fine. I woke up, made some calls, ate breakfast, reflected on French women's pubic hair, cleaned the apartment, paid bills...pretty average morning. The only thing missing was a gigantic cup of coffee. This is probably the biggest reason for my headache. I'm addicted to caffeine now.

I was going to grab a cup on the way to the interview, but I ran out of time. My coat needed a major lint brushing as my gray scarf has some molting issues. It took a good fifteen minutes to clean the darn thing, but it was worth it. Lint annoys me so to make sure my coat stayed clean I ditched the gray scarf and wore a new white one instead.

A teenage couple passed by me on my walk to the interview. I wasn't paying too much attention to them until I heard the guy yell "Meow!" in my general direction. I didn't look up because really, meow all you want, I'm not one to judge. Apparently the couple wanted a reaction though because I heard them turn around and keep meowing. Whatever, I kept walking. It wasn't until two blocks later that I figured out why they meowed. At least I THINK this is why...my fecking white scarf has a shedding problem too.

You know that scene in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation when the cat bursts into flames under the recliner? I shit you not, that is exactly how my navy blue coat looked. My white scarf exploded.

Again I have no idea if this is why those kids were meowing. If it was, HYSTERICAL. I applaud those damn teens for being the witty fucks that they are. Headache reason two? The face-scrunching determination I had trying to wipe the dead cat off of me before the HR lady came to the lobby. I failed.

The last reason for my headache was the car company itself. I thought it would be your average corporate building with average cubicles, offices, and windows. I was wrong. The building was like all the other rundown industrial ones on the 7 train line. Crappy offices, crappy neighborhood, no windows, no circulation. It smelled like every mechanic/car shop in Jersey: wet cigarette butts, gasoline, and tears. The stench was so bad that I think my brain was trying to leave my head. Ugh. No thanks.

Aaaahhh...both the coffee and Tylenol have finally kicked in. Good bye, invisible corkscrewing jackass. You suck.